The first thing you should know about me is that I’m a dating geek.

I started online dating in 2005, doing round after round through the years until I finally stopped for good in 2020 after meeting my wonderful partner. The last round of dating was crazy, check out these stats:

• 6 apps

• 8 months

• 35 first dates

• 64 dates total

How do I know the exact numbers, you ask? Well, I kept a spreadsheet! I wanted a clear view of what worked and what didn’t. I saw the changes I made to my profile that resulted in ZERO matches for three weeks. I noticed what kind of profile wording and photos brought in the WRONG matches. And I was able to see which apps led to more second and third dates — and which apps resulted in shallow connections that ended after the first date.

That kind of thinking is exactly what you can help your clients adopt: a scientific, structured, “I’m gonna keep tinkering with this until it works” kind of approach to a process that can feel disorienting, emotional, and traumatic without support.

I developed my more structured approach to dating in 2016 after seeing my clients struggle to translate my usual talk-therapy approach into success with dating. My clients needed help with the nuts and bolts: choosing the right photos, picking an app, writing their profile, messaging. Flirting. Setting up dates. Dealing with rejection. So many skills!

But what skills do you teach? In an ever-changing world of apps, it can be hard to know how to stay on top of the latest trends. Especially when you’re seeing articles lamenting the death of dating apps, or how Gen Z is using some novel in-person dating approach, or how apps are riddled with scammers.

Let me help you boil it down for your clients:

• What are the techniques that really work?

• Can they also try to meet someone in real life?

• How can they build closeness and intimacy in such an impersonal dating culture?